Social Skills: You should give them a shot too

I'll be the first to admit that T really struggles with social skills.  She has no filter and when she doesn't know what to say, she goes into fight or flight mode and can be really, well nasty.  She doesn't know what to say, gets anxious, and knows that people expect her to say something, so she just starts spewing.  This makes for some uncomfortable situations, to say the least.  However, most people are very understanding and receptive when I explain that T has Asperger's and we're constantly working on social skills.  You know there are always "those people", though.  We were at the park today when a grandmother and her granddaughter rode up on their bikes.  T was obsessively working on the monkey bars and was not about to give up.  Of course I knew what was coming when the other little girl went straight for the monkey bars and was hovering over T saying, "You're 6?  Well I'm only 5 and I can do the monkey bars.  Why can't you do them?".  T then said something to the girl that I didn't hear.  I get that T wasn't being appropriate and how the grandmother could be initially offended.  I heard the grandmother say, "She told you to leave and never come back?".  Prior to that I'd all ready been coaching T on social skills, and doing so in a voice that everyone could clearly hear.  I was praising M for her use of social skills and encouraging her to show her big sister how to approach new friends.  You would think that should've tipped the woman off to a few things.  After I heard the grandmother asking her granddaughter if that's what T said, I immediately moved in and said, "I'm sorry.  She has autism and social situations aren't easy for her.  We're always working on it."  That's the point most people become understanding and really try to support what we're working on.  This was not one of those situations.  As I'm saying this to the grandmother she continues to talk over the top of me while saying to her granddaughter, "That's OK.  You don't need to listen to or be influenced by people with bad attitudes.  This is a park and you can be here whenever you want.  She's just not nice."  At no point did she ever acknowledge that I was speaking to her, or that I was obviously feeding T appropriate things to say and trying to work with her.